Core Desired Feelings: A Different Way to Set Intentions and Goals

Core Desired Feelings: A Different Way to Set Intentions and Goals

New Year’s resolutions often focus on what we want to achieve: lose weight, exercise more, earn more, organize the house, change jobs, travel or finally complete something we have been putting off.

Another useful question is:

How do I want to feel while I am living my life?

That question can shift goal setting away from simply accomplishing more and toward understanding what actually matters to you.

What Are Core Desired Feelings?

The idea of Core Desired Feelings was popularized by Danielle LaPorte. Instead of beginning with external goals, you begin by identifying how you want to feel.

You might choose words such as:

  • peaceful
  • connected
  • confident
  • playful
  • grounded
  • free
  • creative
  • strong
  • loved
  • energized

These feelings can then become a filter for decisions and goals.

Start With the Areas That Matter Most

Choose a few areas of life that feel important right now.

For example:

  • relationships
  • health
  • work
  • family
  • creativity
  • finances
  • community
  • personal growth

Then ask yourself:

How do I want to feel in this part of my life?

Try not to choose the word you think you should want. Choose the one that actually feels meaningful to you.

My Core Desired Feelings in 2019

When I originally wrote this article at the end of 2018, I was beginning a three-year therapeutic counselling training program and doing a lot of personal reflection.

At that time, the feelings I chose were:

Acceptance

For me, acceptance meant practicing less resistance to what was already happening.

It did not mean approving of everything, becoming passive or believing that every difficult experience happened for a reason.

It meant trying to see reality more clearly before deciding how I wanted to respond.

Light-Hearted

I wanted more playfulness, ease and humour in my life.

It was a reminder that growth does not always have to feel heavy.

Love

Love meant caring deeply about the people in my life while also learning to bring more kindness toward myself.

Vibrant and Alive

I also wanted to feel energetic, engaged and connected to my body.

That feeling naturally connected with movement, time outdoors and taking care of my health.

Turn Feelings Into Actions

Choosing a word can feel inspiring, but the next step is asking:

What would help me experience more of this feeling in real life?

If you want to feel connected, you might call a friend, join a group or schedule time with family.

If you want to feel strong, you might begin strength training, practice boundaries or take on something that challenges you.

If you want to feel peaceful, you might create more quiet time, reduce unnecessary commitments or practice mindfulness.

The feeling becomes more useful when it leads to behaviour.

Intentions and Goals Can Work Together

You do not have to choose between intentions and measurable goals.

They can support each other.

For example:

Desired feeling: Strong
Intention: Take care of my body consistently.
Goal: Strength train twice each week for the next three months.

Or:

Desired feeling: Connected
Intention: Invest more energy in friendships.
Goal: Reach out to one friend each week.

The feeling gives the goal meaning.

Revisit Your Words Regularly

Your Core Desired Feelings do not need to be permanent.

What you need this year may be completely different from what you needed five years ago.

Write your words somewhere visible and revisit them occasionally.

Ask:

Is this still how I want to feel?
Are my current choices moving me toward that?
Does this word still fit who I am becoming?

Avoid Turning Feelings Into Another Standard to Meet

There is one potential trap with this kind of work.

If your desired feeling is “peaceful,” that does not mean you have failed every time you feel angry or overwhelmed.

If you choose “joyful,” you do not need to force yourself to feel positive when something genuinely hurts.

A Core Desired Feeling can give you direction without requiring you to suppress normal emotions.

Create Your Own Core Desired Feelings

Try this simple exercise:

  1. Choose three important areas of your life.
  2. Write several feelings you would like to experience in each.
  3. Circle the words that keep appearing.
  4. Choose two to four that feel most meaningful.
  5. Ask what actions could support each feeling.
  6. Choose one small step to begin.

You can combine this approach with Goal Setting for Health and Fitness if you want to turn a broader intention into something more concrete.

For practical support around movement, nutrition and sustainable habits, you can also explore Health & Lifestyle Coaching.

When the Work Goes Deeper

Sometimes goal setting brings up more than motivation.

You may notice perfectionism, fear, self-criticism, old beliefs or patterns that make it difficult to move toward the life you want.

That is where counselling can offer a different kind of support.

You can read more about Building the Life You Want through Vancouver Island Holistic Counselling.

Choose Direction, Not Perfection

You do not need to know exactly how the year will unfold.

A few meaningful words can simply help you remember what you want more of and guide some of the choices you make along the way.

The goal is not to feel one way all the time.

It is to keep moving in a direction that feels more aligned with the life you want to create.

Yoga Breathwork: Ujjayi, Belly Breathing, Alternate Nostril Breathing and More

Yoga Breathwork: Ujjayi, Belly Breathing, Alternate Nostril Breathing and More

Alternate nostril breathing, breathwork, contraindications, kapalabhati, lion breath, ujjayi, yoga breathing techniques

Breathwork, or pranayama, is an important part of many yoga traditions. Some techniques are gentle and calming, while others are more stimulating and require more care.

The breath can be used as a point of focus, a way to slow down, and a tool for connecting movement with attention. It is useful to approach breathwork with curiosity rather than assuming every technique is appropriate for every person.

Ujjayi Breath

Ujjayi is commonly used in Vinyasa and flow-based yoga. It is created by breathing through the nose while gently narrowing the back of the throat, producing a soft sound similar to ocean waves.

The sound can help you focus and keep a steady rhythm during movement.

How to Practice

Sit or stand comfortably and begin with normal nasal breathing. Imagine gently fogging a mirror with the mouth open, then try to recreate that same sensation with the mouth closed.

Keep the throat relaxed. The breath should feel controlled, but not strained.

Why People Use It

Ujjayi can help create rhythm and concentration during yoga practice. It may also make it easier to notice when your effort level is becoming too high.

You can read more in Ujjayi Breath: How to Practice It in Yoga.

Diaphragmatic or Belly Breathing

Diaphragmatic breathing involves allowing the lower ribs and abdomen to expand as you inhale instead of keeping the breath high in the chest.

This style of breathing can feel grounding and can help slow the pace of respiration.

How to Practice

Sit or lie comfortably. Place one hand on the chest and one on the abdomen.

As you inhale, notice the lower ribs and belly gently expand. As you exhale, let them soften.

There is no need to force the belly outward.

Why People Use It

This can be a simple way to bring attention to the breath and encourage a slower, more relaxed breathing pattern.

Alternate Nostril Breathing

Alternate nostril breathing, also known as Nadi Shodhana, is a traditional pranayama practice that alternates breathing through one nostril and then the other.

In yoga philosophy, it is often associated with creating balance.

How to Practice

Sit comfortably.

Gently close one nostril and inhale through the other. Switch sides and exhale. Then inhale through that same side, switch, and exhale through the opposite nostril.

Continue slowly for a few rounds.

When to Modify

If you are congested, dizzy, uncomfortable or feel short of breath, return to normal breathing.

The traditional energetic explanations can be meaningful within yoga philosophy, but they should not be presented as proven medical facts.

Lion Breath

Lion Breath is a playful technique involving a deep inhale followed by an open-mouth exhale with the tongue extended.

It is often used in yoga classes to loosen tension in the face and jaw and to create a sense of playfulness.

How to Practice

Sit or kneel comfortably.

Take a comfortable inhale through the nose, then open the mouth, extend the tongue and exhale with a soft “ha” sound.

Repeat a few times without forcing the throat.

Kapalabhati

Kapalabhati is a more vigorous traditional pranayama technique that uses active, quick exhalations through the nose with passive inhales.

It is sometimes grouped together with Breath of Fire, although these practices are not identical in every yoga tradition.

Because it is more intense, this is not the technique I would recommend learning casually from a blog post.

Practice With Caution

Learn Kapalabhati from an experienced teacher who can observe your technique.

Avoid or modify strong breath practices if they make you dizzy, light-headed, uncomfortable or breathless. People who are pregnant or who have cardiovascular, respiratory or other medical concerns should speak with a qualified healthcare professional before practicing forceful breathing techniques.

Not Every Breath Technique Is Calming

One important point is that breathwork does not affect everyone the same way.

Slow, comfortable breathing may feel grounding for one person and uncomfortable for another. Faster breathing techniques can feel stimulating rather than relaxing.

If a technique increases anxiety, dizziness or discomfort, stop and return to normal breathing.

Breathwork and the Nervous System

Breathing patterns can influence how the body feels, especially when breathing becomes slower and more deliberate.

However, it is better to avoid exaggerated claims that breathwork automatically lowers blood pressure, detoxifies the body, oxygenates cells dramatically, balances hormones or treats anxiety.

Those claims go beyond what a general yoga article should promise.

Breathwork as Part of Yoga

Breathwork can be woven into yoga in simple ways:

  • inhale as you lengthen
  • exhale as you fold
  • use the breath to slow down
  • pause when breathing becomes strained
  • notice whether the breath feels smooth or forced

The breath can become useful feedback rather than something you have to perform perfectly.

Start Simple

If you are new to pranayama, start with easy, comfortable breathing rather than advanced or forceful techniques.

Gentle Ujjayi, diaphragmatic breathing and simple alternate nostril breathing are usually easier starting points than strong practices like Kapalabhati.

If you want to explore breath-led movement in person, learn more about Yoga & Mobility Classes in Nanaimo.

For a deeper counselling perspective on breath, stress and the nervous system, you can also read Breathwork, the Nervous System, and Epigenetic Trauma.

Chaturanga and Warrior Pose Yoga Sequence for Strength, Control and Focus

Chaturanga and Warrior Pose Yoga Sequence for Strength, Control and Focus

Chaturanga Dandasana, or Four-Limbed Staff Pose, is a demanding yoga posture that combines upper-body strength, shoulder stability, core control and body awareness. It is often used as a transition in Vinyasa yoga, but it is worth practicing on its own so you can build the position gradually instead of rushing through it.

This sequence combines Chaturanga preparation with Warrior poses and a slower finish. The goal is not to force strength, but to create better control and alignment.

Warm Up First

Begin with a few rounds of Sun Salutations.

Use Downward-Facing Dog as a place to pause and notice the breath.

You can also include:

  • Cat-Cow
  • Plank
  • knees-down Plank
  • Cobra
  • Low Lunge
  • shoulder circles

Make sure the wrists and shoulders feel ready before adding repeated Chaturanga work.

Learn the Chaturanga Shape on the Floor

Start lying on your belly.

Place the hands beside the lower ribs and draw the elbows back rather than letting them flare wide.

Engage the legs and abdomen, and gently press the hands into the mat.

Think about keeping the chest broad and the shoulders from collapsing forward.

You do not need to lift high.

Practice the Lowering Phase

A useful way to build strength is to practice the descent from Plank.

Start in Plank or a knees-down variation.

Shift the shoulders slightly forward, then bend the elbows and lower slowly toward the floor.

Keep the body controlled rather than dropping.

Repeat 2–3 times.

This eccentric phase can help you develop the strength needed for the full pose.

Modify Chaturanga

You do not need to hover the entire body off the floor right away.

Try:

  • knees-down Chaturanga
  • lowering only halfway
  • using blocks under the shoulders
  • lowering all the way to the belly
  • holding the shape for one or two breaths

If the front of the shoulder feels pinched or unstable, back off and use a simpler variation.

You can also read Chaturanga Dandasana: Alignment, Strength and Modifications for a Safer Practice for a more detailed breakdown.

Warrior I

From Downward-Facing Dog, step one foot forward and rise into Warrior I.

Ground through both feet and adjust your stance until you feel stable.

Reach the arms overhead or keep the hands on the hips if that feels better.

Stay for 3–5 breaths.

Warrior II

Open into Warrior II.

Let the front knee track comfortably over the foot and extend the arms in opposite directions.

Keep the stance strong without forcing the hips to square.

Stay for 3–5 breaths.

Reverse Warrior

From Warrior II, reach the front arm up and back.

Keep the front knee bent and let the movement come from the side body rather than collapsing into the lower back.

Take one or two breaths.

Side Angle

Bring the forearm to the thigh or the hand toward a block.

Reach the opposite arm overhead or keep it on the hip.

Choose the variation that lets you breathe comfortably.

Stay for 3–5 breaths.

Flow Through the Warrior Sequence

After practicing each pose slowly, move through them more fluidly.

For example:

  • inhale Warrior I
  • exhale Warrior II
  • inhale Reverse Warrior
  • exhale Side Angle

Repeat for a few rounds, then switch sides.

Keep the transitions smooth rather than rushing.

Return to Chaturanga

After the standing work, return to Plank.

Practice another controlled lowering into Chaturanga or a knees-down version.

Notice whether your shoulders and core feel different after the warm-up and Warrior sequence.

Quality matters more than repetition.

Sphinx Pose

Lie on your belly and place the forearms on the floor.

Lift the chest gently into Sphinx.

Keep the lower body relaxed and avoid forcing the backbend.

Child’s Pose With Side Bend

Sit back into Child’s Pose.

Walk the hands slightly to one side to create a stretch through the opposite side body.

Repeat on the other side.

Supine Twist

Lie on your back and bring both knees toward the chest.

Let them fall gently to one side.

Keep the shoulders relaxed and repeat on the other side.

Supported Backbend

Place a block or bolster under the upper back or pelvis, depending on the position you are using.

Let the body rest rather than actively pushing into the pose.

Stay for several comfortable breaths.

Finish With Stillness

End in Savasana or another comfortable resting position.

Let the breath return to normal and notice how the shoulders, chest, hips and legs feel after the stronger work.

If mantra is part of your practice, you can include one here, but it is completely optional.

Strength Without Force

Chaturanga and Warrior poses can be excellent tools for building strength and control, but they work best when you use versions that suit your body.

Strength does not require forcing a posture.

The goal is to create enough stability that you can move with more confidence and less strain.

If you want to explore these movements in person, learn more about Yoga & Mobility Classes in Nanaimo or Personal Training in Nanaimo for individualized strength and movement support.